Me With Other Guys' Girlfriends: CSz Edition

A photo montage not to be taken seriously. (listening to: The sound of the men of CSz wanting to punch me.)


K, Girlfriend of The Taint


Also named K, girlfriend of Hall-See


And this is JNL, girlfriend of Mustache Ranger #1

All these guys are good people, and each can punch me in the face one time. One thing, though: How come nobody told me that I have three chins when I smile? Seriously? What is wrong with me. Anyway, enjoy. Three beautiful ladies, Just one me. Wait... Make that four.



Oh, and I had to add this. This is Mike, doing BOTH Barbara Streisand AND Neil Diamond singing "You Don't Bring Me Flowers." It was... nothing shy of unbelievable. And check out that sweater...



END TRANSMISSION...

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!

"Well, it's kind of like a mix between hockey and soccer, only less people." (listening to: "Shine on You Crazy Diamond" by Pink Floyd)



So, Friday night was something I've been looking forward to for a little under a year now. A Minnesota Swarm game. Minnesota has a professional Lacrosse team. Yes, it's a professional league. They have uniforms and everything. It's easily one of the most exciting and entertaining sporting events I've ever been to. And I've been to them all. Four 15-minute quarters, 5-on-5 action. The game had everything I could have wanted it to have to turn Jabas and his date into fans. A high-scoring game, a "performance team" (basically cheerleaders with midriff-baring ensembles), and even a fight! If you have the means and the time, please go to one. My favorite part is the announcer- he's catty and openly mocks the other team throughout the entire game over the Xcel loudspeakers. Think Ryan Seacrest, only with a sports jersey and a MUCH better sense of humor.

Some Highlights of the evening:

* (After the Swarm draw first blood 17 seconds into the match) Announcer: "That's right folks, for those of you new to Swarm games, they score every 17 seconds. The final score of this game will be 485 to 0." (Yes, his math was wrong. Actual final score would be 211 - 0)

* A woman behind me: "My husband told me a little bit about this, but I can never remember how many quarters are in a game."

* (The jumbotron shows a member of the aforementioned "performance team" sitting next to a 15-year-old kid, who looks COMPLETELY uninterested in the entire thing) Audrey and I at the same time: "He's gay."

* They had a rock-paper-scissors competition at halftime. The fat guy in the stupid hat did NOT win. And he lost to a girl.

* (Audrey was completely disinterested in the entire game until the fight broke out, leaving one Swarm player with his jersey and pads around his neck, exposing his chest.) Audrey: "Yeah! Yeah! YEAH!! DO IT!! ... Oh My God.. that was the most homoerotic thing I've ever seen! That was AWESOME!"

And the best part of the evening was this guy:


He was completely soused by the middle of the 2nd quarter, and decided to cheer for the other team. This did not sit too well with the 2 DOZEN kids sitting in his section, and after every Swarm goal, they would RUN down to where he was sitting and YELL as loudly as they could whatever they could think of about how awesome the Swarm were. He was drunk and fought with them, and we all loved it. At one point, one of the kids took his hat off and ran away with it. He may or may not have gotten it back.

Final Score: Swarm- 11, Knighthawks- 10, Madjai- Infinity.

END TRANSMISSION

Worst. Day. Ever.

What a horrible start to my work week. (listening to: Hope rushing out of my life like air into a vacuum)

I'll let this article speak for itself. And I swear I didn't edit that picture in MS Paint at all. (His horns are a little hard to see, but they're there)


House Costars Engaged
FRIDAY JANUARY 05, 2007 09:15 PM EST
By Julie Jordan

Actress Jennifer Morrison and actor Jesse Spencer, who costar on FOX's hit medical drama House, became engaged over the holidays in Paris, PEOPLE has learned.

Morrison, 27, who plays Dr. Allison Cameron, and Spencer, also 27, who portays Dr. Robert Chase, met while filming the pilot for the series, which debuted in 2004.

A rep for the couple says no wedding date has been set.

END TRANSMISSION... (and life)


EDIT: This is how it should be.

New Show!!

Alright, Alright already!! You want a new post, here it is! (listening to: regret at auditioning for True West)


The Lakeshore Players
present:
All My Sons
Starring:
THE MADJAI as Chris Keller

So, as The Mousetrap ended a little more than two weeks ago, I got bored and went to another audition. This time, way up in White Bear Lake. (Those of you who live more than 20 minutes away from this frigid northland theatre are excused from attending this performance.) The script is FANTASTIC, and I managed to fool the director into thinking I can play a romantic lead! Ha Ha! Skinny character actor, FTW!

Anyway, the show dates are on the website (click above), as well as on My Website, so you have no reason to miss this one, unless you hate the drive. But really, I'm making it 5x a week, so to come once isn't unreasonable, is it? IS IT? No, I thought not.

PS- for those of you keeping score at home, if I can be allowed to ignore the fact that I auditioned for True West and didn't get called back, then this makes the 9th consecutive audition I've been cast in. If you're going to be a stickler for rules like The Rooster, then this is the second show in a new streak.

END TRANSMISSION.