Buried Treasure

Looky Looky what I found!! (listening to: an angelic choir)

So.. a long time ago, Biggy asked me to find an old story that he had written to me on one of my IM "away" sessions. Well. I found it. :)

The part at the end refers to the video game "Kingdom Hearts," which the group had gotten quite into about this time. Please note, I've left the spelling and grammatical errors in, to keep the "Freshness" of the story. Enjoy, as so many others have.

Andy says:
Why is it necessary for you to sign on three times when any average person would be ok with doing it just once? Hmmm? And now you're gonna be a bastard and not talk to me. You know what happens then… Stories.

So I'm on the family Yacht, and we're cruising around in the pacific off the Mexican coast. And we were grilling, and I had already eaten about 4 burgers and I didn't want to finish my 5th, so I tossed it off the side thinking nothing of it. Then my dad stops so we can get all set up to go wakeboarding.

So I'm splashing around trying to get the damn board on my feet. Have you ever tried to do that? It's hard as fuck. Then I feel something moving around in the water, but think nothing of it, thinking it's probably just the rope. So I get all ready and dad guns it. I fell down like you do the first couple of times unless you're a professional. Damn those guys. I feel something swimming around again and this time I'm a little freaked out because there is no slack in the rope.
Third time, I get up, but we're going pretty slow, because dad has the motor set in the water all wrong and I'm big so the boat is dragging a little, I tell him to turn it up. He misinterprets and thinks something’s wrong so he stops, suddenly there is something nibbling on my leg... Nay, not simply nibbling, but like a large dog "playfully" biting at my leg. I freak out a little and start thrashing around. Suddenly I get drug underwater, luckily I got a good breath in, I open my eyes (it's ok, it's salt water, good for the eyes) and see this Jaws-like creature tugging at my leg

I punched him in the face. and made it back up for some more air, he pulls me under again. By now, he has torn my flesh a little so I'm bleeding and a bunch of his little friends have show up. So I'm like ok, I have about a minute and a half of air. So I target the big one (by pushing R1) and take him the fuck out with some fira, then there's about 12 little ones. I’m thinking oh great just like seed two in the Pegasus cup. So I start using my berserker (or whatever) combo and take out about 6 of them. By now I'm down to like 30 sec of air. I'm down on magic and forgot to equip some ether back on the boat. I'm halfway through my hitpoints and I used up all my potion on Donald cause he's a worthless bastard.

So I'm like, fucking A. Just like Nam, me surrounded by 6 Charlie with like 4 rounds left in my gun. So I fucking start attacking this way and that. 2 down, 15 seconds left, 5 down. I'm down to 3 seconds, 1 fucker left and he's just out of reach so I do my rolly thing (yeah in water. I'm THAT good) and I whoop his ass, with one second left to ascend 15 feet to the surface. I come up gasping for breath and my dad is standing at the back of the boat cussing up a storm. He looks at me and says: "What the hell are you doing? I thought you fucking drowned. If you suck this bad at wakeboarding, I'm not pulling you anymore." I tried to explain what happened, but he just said "Baaa" and I got back in the boat and got drunk with my gay uncle on White Russians.

Andy says:
The end